So the FOTA teams haven't been consulted on the new rules. FOTA (or the world car manufactures as they should really be called) want to have a say how they brands are promoted. that means they want to make the rules up.
The FIA as head of world motorsport and the rule makers (as in any other sport) keep telling the manufactures to stop pushing in the tuck shop line and do as they're told.
It all started with Max telling all and sundry that this sport needs to be cheap and cheerful and so there were going to be a set of rules for teams running to a budget and they'ed get to have a huge advantage and stuff. the established car maunfactures didn't like the sound of that so started throwing their weight around and asking for more tuck shop privileges and a choice of either dime bars, snikers and Mars bars not trackers and oat cakes which may well be healthy but taste like shite. Max said he was incharge and they could all fuck right off
Then Bernie stepped in and said the school guv'ners (CVC who own the comersial rights to F1) were not happy ... not happy at all. And that Max ought to consider his future and knee caps very carefully. know what i mean guv.
Then Max called all the FOTA chaps Loonies at the british GP
So Max and Bernie and Monty and Flav all sit down in a smokey room and thrash out a plan.
they walk out of the room and say "ha, it was all a misunderstanding, tuck shop privilages are back on and, i'll quit as headmaster. But we're going to have some new boys (who i might have choosen personaly because they're all old mates) and I'm still ace and the FOTA chaps are a bit nutty but not Loonies"
FOTA told everyone that Max "is a fucking nutter dictator who wanted to bugger the upper 5th in the showers after rugger practice and he smelt of moth balls and was mad and we always hated him ha ha ha ah ah a"
Max didn't like the dictator slur, and said "fuck you, i'm thinking of staying on now unless you bastards take that back"
FOTA said "fuck off grandad"
Bernie said "hitler was a rubbish dictator and the Saddam is greatly missed"
Then Bernie said "sorry about the hitler thing, he was a bad man, but Max is aceness incarnate"
Now it appears that the FIA have told the FOTA chaps that becuase they got all arsey and thretend to go and play with their own ball, they can't now have a say in how the new rules will be made. FOTA though they had a say becuase they were on the list of teams to take part next year which got published a few weeks ago.
But the FIA are saying FOTA said they wern't playing until the concorde agreement had been signed, which it won't be until after the rules are worked out.
FOTA have thrown their arms into the air and are now gathered round the back of the bike shed telling all the 4th year girls that they could have Max if they wanted too.
Max is calling them all a bunch of yobs who should just grow up.
Indeed D H Lawrence would have had a field day with the exploration of relationships between, say, Max, Bernie, Flavio and Ron, that even his verbose prose would have been rendered interesting.
ReplyDeleteOf course the genius would have been in transposing his use of the 'industrial' world, he was writing in the late nineteenth century after all, into the 'post-industrial' world of F1 and motor racing, which is these days more about electronics and physics rather than engineering that Lawrence would have known.
Having said all that, this whole spat is just a load of bollocks