At last, its all over ...

And so it all comes to an end, it’s been a long year this one, we’re traversed the world a dozen times to some far flung places to watch cars go round and round past half empty grandstands.

We’ve listened to Redbull bleat on endlessly about its engine woes, how the Renault was so bad, how no one would give them an engine. Then we had the frankly ridiculous sight of the team owner of one of the richest teams in the sports history, who owns a company that makes more money per minute than most third world countries spend on healthcare, whining that Mercedes and Ferrari wanted upwards of 30 million Euros for a year’s supply of engine.  An engine with a  winning pedigree you will note and ultimately this complaining about having to spend too much money by the richest team on the grid lead the FIA to propose plans for a Tescos value engine in 2017. Other value brands will be available, check local stores for details.

Thankfully the budget plan was binned and the engine manufactures agreed to lower the cost of their engines and share the supply round a bit more. Redbull went back to  Renault and pretty much begged to buy unbadged French engines with no yellow logos or Infiniti sponsorship. If they think they had a bad year in 2015, next year is going to be all kinds of pain.

This year was yet another where the racing was over shadowed by talk of money. Who had it, who wanted it, and who was taking it out of the sport?  But then, it didn’t take too much to overshadow the racing this year. One poor punter even attempted to find something interesting to watch by walking on the track during the race at Singapore.

Far too often our eyes drooped lower and lower as the processional races dragged on. Cars simply can't follow and over take one another unless there is a massive difference in top speed. The fact that a McLaren 20 mph in a straight line less than a Williams can't be passed at a place like Abu Dhabi, tells you everything you need to know.

 Formula one continued to keep all the goodies to itself unless you were prepared to pay a hefty wedge for it. The £20 for the app was the tip of the iceberg, Germany bailed when it couldn’t afford to pay the sanctioning fee and later the circuit of the Americas in Texan said they were going to struggle when state funding was cut next year. F1 is moving further and further away from its European heartland. Next year we’re going to Azerbaijan and a new street circuit round Baku, because of the rich and vibrant heritage of motorsport in the former Soviet satellite state.

But given how close it is to the hot spots of the Middle East and with the horror in Paris still fresh in our minds, let’s see if we actually go next year shall we.  

The BBC are making noises about not showing any live F1 next year. With the need to cut cost as licence fee negotiations drag on with the government, an expensive program carting a ton of equipment and personal around the world looks like an unnecessary expense to the suits in Whitehall. With Bernie’s absolute reluctance to countenance any live internet feed that can’t be monetised  soon the only way you’ll be able to see a race live will be through satellite pay walls. F1 is getting expensive and someone has to pay to keep the whole mess rolling along.

What has struck me the most this year has been the startling lack of fans in the stands. Hugh swaths of seating were empty on Friday and Saturday and only marginally livelier on Sunday for the race.  If you watched any of the GP2 action this year, there were times when a driver would be lucky to see a handful of spectators as he raced around. Now I don’t have any figures to hand because it’s a big faff to go hunting for them but I’ll put good money on this year being seen by the fewest people since the 80’s, well maybe the Vettel and Schumacher years had lower numbers. But my point is F1 is dying as a spectator sport, it costs too much to go and watch the show live because Bernie is screwing every dime out of the circuits and promoters. Then you can’t watch it live on TV unless you’re paying Sky or whatever local service you have, who are also paying through the nose to Bernie.

F1 was always a pretty exclusive, but these days the only people that can afford to follow it are the sort that turn up to the hospitality box after the port and cheese course around lap 40.

We, the muddy scum, are pushed back further and further behind more and more advertising hoarding and asked to pay higher and higher entrance fees. It’s almost like they don’t actually want us there! Go to a WEC race and you can wonder the pits during the race. Talk to drivers and sit where you like. Sure. I know there are far fewer people at an endurance race that isn’t Le Mans. But you feel like the ACO who organise the race want you there, actively encourage you to follow drivers, teams and the championship.  This year Porsche beat Audi to win the drivers and constructors title, it came down to the last hour of the last race. It was fantastic and it was everything F1 wasn’t.

F1 racing in 2015 was mostly dull, prescribed and artificial.  The rich teams were out the front and the poor teams (and McLaren) were at the back. Customer teams never challenged the works squads, it was difficult to see a team other than Mercedes winning and generally that was Hamilton. Nico rallied at the end with a career best three in a row, but it was far too late to make a difference to the entertainment. Ferrari did win races, but only when the Merc had problems, the German winning machine was never raced for the lead or beaten for pace. Well maybe in Singapore.

Reading that back it all seems a bit depressing doesn't it? Let's have a look at the drivers and see if we can find something a bit more upbeat.

So in reverse championship order, this is how they did.

Will Stevens - Marussia - Zero points.

Not as much fun as Super Max was last year, Will was sort of there and couldn't beat his regular team mate Merhi. He apparently has enough money for a seat next year when the team gets the Merc engine.

Alexander Rossi/Roberto Merhi - Marussia - Zero.

Merhi seemed to be last an awful lot but actually got a 12th at Silverstone and Rossi also got a 12th in America. Again both where sort of there, mostly getting out of the way of the big boys of the upper sixth form. I can't remember them doing anything much of note, well maybe we should give Rossi some props for turning up and not being yet another awful American driver. I thought he did alright to get in the car and be as competitive as Stevens was. We might see either of them again, but as usual it will depend on who has the money.

Marcus Ericsson - Sauber - 9.

Marcus showed some moments of class, but more often than not was out shone by his team mate. his best result of 8th was in Australia and it wasn't until Italy before he got close to that, usually he'd finish somewhere between 12th and 14th, nothing exciting, just a solid driver in an average car.

Fernando Alonso - McLaren - 11

Hey look it's the end of the season and here we are wondering if Fernando will be on the grid next year yet again! But can you blame him? Abu Dhabi saw him passed by two Ferraris racing for third place whilst he plodded on to a lowly 17th. He was in that car last year and now here he is tooling around in an ill handling car at the back of the grid, he only just beat Ericsson in the Sauber. He only troubled the top ten twice all year 5th in Hungary and 10th in England. This was not the plan when he told Ferrari what it could do with its 2015 racing plan. He kept a lid on things until Japan when the frustration burst forth to tell the team just what he thought of the Honda power unit. Poor old Alonso, he is a great talent, but he's getting old and another season like this will be his last.

Jenson Button - McLaren - 16

Where Alonso got grumpier and grumpier as the season wore on Jenson's grin just seemed to get wider and wider. Sure he was scrapping with the Saubers and Marussias, but he always managed to find something positive and still be honest with the media and fans. Sure the car was a dog, but he had fun and made it to the top ten four times.  He just got on with things and accepted this wasn't going to be a glorious season. You had to admire him, and if you watched each interview carefully you could see him hitching the Bonhomie up just before checking the stiff upper lip was in place.

Yes a year to forget for McLaren, but it's in the past now and things can only get better.

Carlos Sainz - Torro Rosso - 18

Carlos was in grave danger of being lost in the hubbub of Verstappen praise at time this year in any other year and he would have been Rookie of the year, but a four race mid season dip just as Max hit his stride saw Sainz fade into the background. Which was a shame because where Max was balls out gungho glory is forever, Sainz was measured and tried to guarantee the points rather than go out in a blaze of glory.  He is a talent and I can see him and max fighting for titles in years to come, he just needs a bit more of Lady Lucks attention.

Pastor Maldonado - Lotus - 27

I still don't know why Pasto has a super licence! Than man proved yet again this year that he is a liability in any car you put him in. He doesn't appear to be able to learn to be sensible and the just accept the car in front is in the way of him. Too often we saw bit of carbon fibre hanging off Maldonado's car and another driver left behind facing the wrong direction or scrapping bits of carbon fibre off the road. The word is Lotus has now been bought by Renault for a bag of chips and a boiled sweet, so this nutcase and his massive pay check are free to race again next year ... no, i have no idea why either.

Filipe Nasr - Sauber - 27

I think Nasr get the place above Maldonado because he isn't an idiot.  He's entirely forgettable, but he's not a danger to other drivers. Filipe did alright, again another rookie that showed promise, nothing too exciting but good solid mid table skills. He'll be in a Williams or Force India in three or four years.

Max Verstappen - Torro Rosso - 49

It took just one move at one race to nail him tot eh title "best rookie since Hamilton, maybe even Senna". Round the outside of Nasr at Spa as they raced through Blanchemont! That one move, that moment of sublime skill made the big boys sit up and take notice. That was a move that required more than blind luck and steady nerve. You need the skills to make a move like that out there. Get it wrong and you're lucky to walk away to pick the bits up. He'll be a F1 champion one day. He's the real deal.

Romain Grosjean - Lotus - 51

Grosjean had a difficult year with a team on the edge of going under at any second. Lotus had bailiffs ready to kick the door in numerous times all year. There were times when they didn't know if the car would make it through the front gate without someone demanding payment for work undertaken of parts delivered. Yet Romain raced his little heart out and scored a memorable podium at Spa. And then as the only French driver on the grid he had to speak for the people of Paris after the terrorist attack in November. Next year he's off to the Ferrari satellite team of Hass, an America team build its cars in America far, far away from the carbon triangle in the UK where everyone else (Except Ferrari) builds or runs their cars from. I hope it's a success for him because the lad deserves a break.

Nico Hulkenberg  - Force India - 58

Went to Le Mans on his weekend off and won the race with Nick Tandy and Earl Bamber. So as far as I'm concerned he's brilliant. A mixed season in F1, always hamstrung with Force India's weird race strategies, he showed he can run at the front when he has a works car it was just a shame it had Porsche written on it.

Sergio Perez - Force India - 78

Yeah okay Perez did a good job this year, he reminded everyone why McLaren though he as the next big thing. He isn't, but he can keep a car on old tyres racing longer than anyone else out there. The third in Russia was well deserved and even a bit feisty. There were actually moments where I started to warm to the guy, I might even start to like him eventually.

Daniel Ricciardo - Redbull - 92

Last year if the Mercs dropped the ball, Riccky would be there to take the win. This year he just didn't seem to have the car under him to give him a chance. He picked up a third in Hungary when everyone else was messing around, but Redbull seemed far more interested in complaining about how unfair it was they weren't winning rather than getting on with trying to race. Ricciardo did alright, but he was racing with a car that didn't have much grunt and was apparently made from chocolate. I think they had almost as many grid penalties as McLaren for engine changes this year, not what you need to mount a challenge.

Daniil Kvyat - Redbull - 95

Daniil sort of grew into a roll he wasn't expecting to be in last year. When Vettel flounced off to Ferrari with barely a backwards glance, Kvyat was push in front of the media to learn he was going to be the replacement. The year started a bit shakily, but as it went on he grew in confidence and started to put some good weekends together, the highlight was a second place in Hungary (a race I still haven't seen so I have no idea how much he did to earn it). He was solid all year and managed to get more than Ricciardo out of the car. Luck, or skill ? I'm not sure.

Filipe Massa - Williams -121

Massa again, did alright with a team that failed to capitalise on last year's form, but it was a solid year with few fireworks and plenty of social media pictures of his lad. You know I've said it before that there is nothing wrong with being a solid midfield driver, but Filipe isn't getting any younger and a driver like Verstappen in a Williams on song would be perfect. Massa is a nice guy and all but it's time to pack the kit bag away now lad. Go out on a high of two third places, nothing embarrassing about that.

Valtteri Bottas - Williams - 136

Bottas is my most disappointing driver of the year, two thirds and a handful of fourth places were just sort of insipid and lack any real guts. He is a better driver than this and he sould have been up there fighting for wins. Williams seemed surprised that Ferrari had leapfrogged then and just didn't have an answer, they didn't try anything spectacular, it was just a case of "the computer says no" and Bottas drove for the points finishes. Then there was Kimi who seemed to get on Valtteris wick, they spent too many races bumping into each other. Mostly it was Kimi doing the bumping, because he was going for it and trying to get some extra points. Bottas was just boring for large parts of the year.

Kimi Raikkonen - Ferrari - 150

Kimi on the other hand was his usual "Not giving a toss what you think buddy" self. He had probably his best year in a while, but once again rocked up had a laugh, did some racing, stared blankly at interviewers asking stupid questions and collected the Ferrari pay check. He got the usual Italian press "You're not trying hard enough" headlines but continued to not care. We used to think he was invincible, the best driver with more fastest laps to his name than anyone in history .. EVER. Probably. But he has become the consummate Solid number two driver. He gets out of the way, doesn't complain and picks up his pay packed. Where Alonso did nothing but complain about every little thing wrong, Kimi smiled, grunted and now he's got 150 points and Alonso has 11. Who do you think had the better game plan in the end ?

Sebastian Vettel - Ferrari - 278

Sebastian was the only creditable challenger to Mercedes all year, but only when they dropped the ball. He was there; aided by the team telling Kimi to get out of the way, to take three wins and generally do a good job of repairing the credibility he lost last year. And you know what, I warmed to the guy, sure he waved that finger around, but he didn't ponce around the paddock reminding everyone he was a four time world champion, he didn't make a big deal out of doing so well, he answered questions and remained a pretty grounded individual. He had some pretty witty one line put downs for Rosberg in the post race interviews and didn't seem to be taking things too seriously; he looked like he was having fun watching the Merc boys fronting up to each other. I'm sure behind closed doors it was all a bit more shouty and demanding, but the team seem to have warmed to him and they appreciated it when he gave them the credit for good results.

The truth is, Vettel is a damn good driver and this year proved he doesn't need to have Redbull logo on his chest to win.

Nico Rosberg - Mercedes - 322

The Merc boys were just miles ahead of everyone else all year and the only thing they raced was each other. Nico lost the title this year because, I personally suspect, his wife was pregnant. The car suited Lewis more at the start of the year, but Nico just didn't seem to be there some weekend, which is a complaint I've had throughout his F1 career. I said at the start of the year this season was going to come down to who had the most off circuit distraction, and it was Nico and his concerns for his wife; which is all perfectly understandable. Its still a shame really, if he had got his act together just a couple of races earlier we might have had a different to the season, but alas no. How much the end of season was down to Lewis not caring or pushing for that final 100th of a second we'll never know. But the last three race weekend were totally dominated by Nico, he looked like a champion for those weekend, he just needs to do it for a whole year.

Lewis Hamilton - Mercedes - 381

After last years, “Have at it lads!” which got rather out of hand towards the end for which the drivers required a stiff talking to, this year was far more sanitised. Mercedes had a 968 page book of “Do’s and definitely don’ts chaps” each race. Written in large bold type on page one was the legend, “Don’t drive into your teammate you numpties!”. Underneath that it said in slightly smaller type, “Yes, that included you Lewis. No, don’t say anything buddy, just don’t do it!”.

For much of the season Lewis and Nico kept a very respectful distance between their cars. But as the season wore on and it became more obvious that Lewis was going to win it eventually, the gap got narrower and narrower. Now, depending on weather you are #TeamLH or #teamNicoWasRobbed, Lewis was making sure of the pass or Nico was lucky to avoid being driven into the wall, The move in Japan was a touch close, but the nudge in America Lewis menat. It was intended to say, "Enough now little boy, this is my title".  Lewis didn't have any self doubt this year, it was a lesson in winning a championship, he just know it was his for the taking and nico wasn't going to get in the way.

 At times it all looked so easy. He wasn't off the podium until race 10 in Hungary, only retired once in Singapore when a thrupeny bit failed. If he didn't win he was still picking up points he was fast, consistent and lucky. That all you need to win a championship. He has a team of people around him that support him and make him feel special; he does a lot of charity work, keeps sponsorships happy and knows how to have a good time. He won with ease this year and it always looked like a "when" not "if" championship run.

 But the hat thing irks me still and the chains and the pious attitude.  I'm sure when he hangs out with his mates he's great company and a generous chap. But I just can't put my finger on what it is that is starting to irritate me about Lewis.  He was far and away the best driver of the year; you don't win titles back to back by winging it. Maybe it's just my English reserve that's getting in the way, his need to demonstrate the trappings of success, that cherry red jet, rather than talk of taking the mechanics out for a curry and beer in Brackley.  He never failed to thank the team for all its hard work and made the point that he wins because of their hard work, but you sort of get the feeling he'd rather be in Miami have a good time than shaking hands in a cold Northamptonshire factory of a Monday morning.

 I still love his driving, his never give up attitude and the way he just keeps going without compromise. I want drivers to race, and I want them to be annoyed that all they can do is follow the car behind. Lewis does all that, he want to be the winner; he argues with the team to give him the best strategy and makes damn sure that if given a sniff he'll take the points. Right now, he is the best driver in F1.  

Okay. Maybe not a classic year then but, well the right man won the title and Mercedes completely dominated. Next year might be different, who knows.

And now the personal bit. 

This has been a difficult year for me and my family. As you know we lost our baby for the second time and it was the last chance we had for another child. It's not a particularly nice thing to happen to anyone and to have it happen twice in quick succession is extremely hard to deal with.

But there is a charity that supports families and helps them come to terms with the loss.
They are called SANDS - the Stillborn and neonatal death charity. They are very kind people and don't get nearly as much recognition as they deserve.

The SANDS website.

Thankfully most families never need to call on them for support.

If you have enjoyed this years prediction game and my rambling words then please help us support the local SANDS group by donating to help them raise money for a memorial garden at Aldershot Crematorium:

A special Garden project.

In memory of Clara and Jamie Bowdidge.

Thank you.

Crank it up one last time

Hurrah, it's the last race of the season. The longest in living memory, you though Mao took a long time to march from one end of china to the other, well that's nothing compared to how long this season has been going on. I was a young, vibrant man in the first flush of 44, my prime years many would argue when this started. And here now this interminable season is almost finally over as I begin my 45th year. This season has literally aged me one whole year. A year I will never get back ... thank you Bernie .. Thanks for nothing !!!

"Come on lads, almost there "

By the holy  beard of Jenson Button I can't wait for this season to end so I can spend Sunday afternoon asleep on the sofa rather than dragging out this raw passionate (often badly spelt I'll grant you) prose, for you my dear an loyal readers. Without who, this would only be read by my brother (possibly) and maybe one or two people stumbling around the back reaches of Blogger late on a Sunday evening.... They say man is the sum of the things he leaves behind. I think I add up to a damaged liver and a vented spleen. 

But passionate prose, yes if nothing it's passionate prose, I've meant every word of this too. I hope I have entertained you this year, and helped to cast some light on those at the back of the grid.  It has been fun to watch Sainz and Verstappen rock up and impress with their grit and determination.  It's been sad too with the utter failure of McLaren, who have gamely got on with things and never stopped trying.  Drivers with lesser metal would have packed up and walked away complaining to anyone who would listen, and to be fair to Alonso here, he only really let it all spill out by Japan, when everyone had realised how much of a mess it all was. By the time they got to Japan, we all knew the engine wasn't up to it, no point denying it anymore.

I hope I have encouraged some of you to follow Webber and Hulkenberg to Le Mans. Maybe catch a bit of the Australian V8's and perhaps look beyond the jaded horizon of Formula One. The WEC had possibly one of the best years of racing I've ever seen.  If you went looking for good racing it was out there, Bernie didn't kill everything off.

But yes we have one more race this year in Abu Dhabi and the Yas Marina circuit. It's the day night race, round the harbour and that building that lights up .. yeah you know the one. It was quite dramatic last year with Nico losing the title to Hamilton. You're not going to get that much drama this year. There is nothing left to race for now; I think all the pride might have been raced for too.  

But F1 cars do look pretty nice under a gazillion watts of street lighting, even if the track does look somewhat empty at times during the race. And the sun going down makes things a little bit more dramatic. 

So it'll all be worth watching, come on, one last go. See if you can get your highest score this week.

ooooh is it my turn again !?!

Good luck.

On and on and on and on ... will it never end ?!!?!?!

It’s November already … damn it November and we still have two races to go. Two pointless races let’s not forget, effectively live test seasons for next year for pretty much everyone. Well maybe not Nico, he’s got something or other to prove to whoever picks up his contract in a year or two’s time. We could all pack up and go home now, nothing is going to change, no one is going to pull out an amazing update to go two seconds a lap faster all of a sudden.

But the circus has rocked up to Brazil, so I suppose we should take a look at the boys and girls, see what is on offer.

First up and Suzie Wolff has announced she is no longer going to pretend that she was ever going to get a ride in a William on a race weekend. Now I personally think this is a bit of a shame, from what I’ve seen of her career she was tenacious and single minded enough to earn the right to be there on merit. She might not have been the kind of driver you just watched because you knew she could pull something special out of the car. But she wasn’t tooling around at the back of the pack getting in the way of the leaders trying to lap her. Solid midfield, and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that at all.  For every Lewis Hamilton there are 15 Ericcson’s and Grosjean’s. Drivers that could have the odd extraordinary race once in a while, even Maldonado won a race once, so to dismiss Mrs Wolff as a rubbish for just being a girl is narrow minded and  rather pathetic. I think she would have been a good ambassador for the sport, erudite, informative and knowledgeable. The sport needs people like Mrs Wolff, but alas it is the usual tale of not enough money for that final step. Hopefully the next lady to arrive with a race suit and the talent will finally get the backing she needs.

Redbull’s 2016 engine saga took a new twist this week with the news they plan to make their own engine now. Quite why a drinks manufacture , yes a very successful and possibly the biggest drinks manufacture in the world, needs an engine making department is anyone’s guess. Maybe they want to put it into the Vettel signature edition Infiniti FX50. Yeah that crazy ultimate street SUV you’ve never heard of that no one wanted, not even the driver with the signature on the dash board.

About as desirable as piles ...

Ferrari makes cars, McLaren makes cars, Mercedes even makes cars whilst Williams and Sauber sell engineering know how to car manufactures. Redbull makes a sickly brown fizzy liquid that rots your teeth and keeps you awake all night. They do not in any way, shape or form sell anything engineering … unless it’s how to put little bubbles into metal cans and sell the resulting toxic waste to all and sundry.

Sure Redbull as an extreme sport, “high five dude, that was gnarly bro” brand. But that’s just on cloths,  baseball caps and snappy paint jobs. It’s not the tinkering in shed out back mob,  those people that know which end of the spark plug goes in first, they’re all for a mug a tea and bacon butty. Partying all night with a tray of Vodka Redbull is something the kids get up to. And the muddy scum standing on the backing at Monaco and Monza are most certainly not dreaming of the day they breeze into an Infiniti dealership and drive out with a new low slung whip.

So why are Redbull going down the own brand engine route. There was talk of Aston Martin poking around looking for a bit of qualify F1 branding a few months back. They’ve got a bit of Arab oil money these days and need something a bit more high profile than GT cars at Le Mans. Their attempt to design their own engine and top flight LMP1 car for Le mans was an utter disaster, a mess from start to finish and almost destroyed the companies reputation. So if they stump up a bit of cash to Redbull, let them use the design centre at Aston martin and stick their name on the engines. Redbull gets a prestige motor manufacture name on the side of the car, they get to design an engine specifically for themselves with no compromises to any other team and if it all goes wrong they can blame someone else, Redbull don’t have to build an engine design centre, they just use the one Aston Martin already have. If it all goes right, then everyone comes out of it smell off high grade four star.  win win.

The next few weeks could be interesting.

Then they announced they’re going to apologies to Renault and gracefully accept their engines next year.

Right Brazil then, which i believe might have had a bit of a makeover.  Well it was supposed to be having a one, the plan was to move the pits to the lower section of the circuit and tidy up the bumps and stuff. But I can’t find anything online to show the result, so maybe they didn’t change it after all.

Anyway, I think Nico might win this, he’s got pride as his co pilot and Lewis has his name on the trophy. The rest ... much the same as before ... But still not predictable enough for some of you. Good luck kids

Don’t forget to update your predictions before Friday.

Rallying is for true petrolheads

It’s not all grandstand seats and five course meals in hospitality you know.

There are the rally boys and girls.

These are the real bedrock of any national motorsport scene, and what I love about this disparate subset are the fans. Sitting on the windswept banking of Silverstone watching a two hour F1 race once a year doesn’t qualify you as a real proper petrol head I’m afraid. That sort of fandom just takes money, the ability to carry a cool box of beer for half a mile to your chosen viewing spot and a willingness to queue for three days to get out of the car park.

No, what sorts the hospitality ponces from the muddy scum fan is a willingness to cling to the edge of a windswept hillside for six hours watching a ramshackle collection of historic cars and yesterdays international high tech machinery slide around a freezing wet muddy forest track which usually after the first half dozen cars, is less a track and more a rutted ditch of mud and gravel. These are my kind of people, the ones out in all weathers, standing around chatting to each other, jovial voices raised in laughter between snarling, spitting Imprezas and Mk2 Escorts

With circuit racing you roll up to the windswept disused airfield in central England then sit watching race after race spin round the circuit for lap after lap. It is all presented nicely for you and there is no real need to move away from the cool box full of beer and sandwiches. It is all too easy. The toilets even have comfy bum bog roll in (well during the morning at least) and the burger van still has some sugar left for your brew

To be a spectator of a national rally, requires skill, daring and a willingness to stand around a damp forest with little to no idea of what, when or if the next car will arrive.

There are no signposts in the forest, other than the odd length of tape to stop the stupid from getting too close to the action. The event website might have a spectator guide for you to download, but that usually just points you towards the expensive car park next to the health and safety approved spectator “entertainment” zone.

The diehard rally fans can be found clambering over lichen covered fences and jumping putrid ditched of mosquito-infested water deep in the forest. Now and again a ragtag assortment of orange jackets “marshals” and mates of a mate of a mate who knows someone whose co driving car 131 will be positioned at a junction or tricky corner and they will point out the the best place to stand and not get killed. You’ll smell them before you see them, little knots of usually bearded men gathered around battered Land Rovers or ancient Subaru, a grimy primer stove cooking bacon sarnies and brewing endless cups of tea. A crackly walkie talkie sputters into life occasionally with updates on when the next car might appear.

You can stop to chat, check what time the next group of cars is due past and from which direction. A marshal with a clipboard and wearing 15 coats will remind you to keep away from the outside of corners and not stand in the way of the gravel spraying from the back of the cars., then everyone smiles and the you moves on to continues to hunt for that perfect view deeper in the wood.

Once you find that perfect view, you wait. There is no race radio to listen too, no diamond vision screen to show replays of practice and the season so far. And don’t expect to purchase a glossy spectator program to keep you informed. The marshal told you when the first car is supposed to be due through, but this is club rallying, time is flexible round these parts, a 3.20pm start time could well mean 4.30pm. Therefore, you stand or sit and while away the time checking your camera settings, cursing the alleged waterproof rating of your trousers/jacket/boots and wonder why you are not at home in front of the TV and warm.

Then the sound of a distant marshal’s whistle breaks the silence, people get to their feet around you and cameras are clicked to ready. You wait, tense and quite, listening for the first car.

 A low insistent mechanical noise starts up, a growl and a pop floating on the wind, indistinct through the wet trees.

Then a bang like a firework going off and the sound of an engine angrily demanding the use of a higher gear, grows rapidly nearer. Travelling fast through the tunnel of trees, the noise bouncing back and forth, the turbo chatters and whines, unspent fuel igniting in load flashy pops and bangs, the engine barks as a foot is mashed to a bulkhead.

Suddenly there it is, rushing headlong towards you, lights blazing, flames erupt from the turbo exhaust as the driver lifts off, dabs the brake to lift the rear of the car urging it all to swap ends, then hard on the loud peddle the rear digs back in showering the road with mud and gravel powering it on towards your vantage point. You raise your camera ready to capture the ferocity of this fire breathing beast that thunders towards you faster and faster. You catch your breath, squeeze the shutter button, capture the moment, the light and noise explode around you, turn away quick or get a face full of gravel spray, red tail lights flash past, then gone, the engine still protesting deep into the dark forest.

The next car will be here in a minuet or so, do you stay put or move, always looking for that perfect picture, the picture that convey the majesty of a car dancing through a dark wet forest.

This is how a proper petrol heads experiences motorsport.

This weekend sees the annual Tempest rally around the Aldershot military land. It's easy to go and find and definitely worth the effort.  

Check out the website for start times and maps of the special stages.

Tempest rally

Take a coat and water proof shoes, its muddy out there.

Back in the USSR, Crimea a river.

Hello you lovely people.

So the days are getting shorter as the warm summer breeze starts to turn damp and just a bit chilly. It’s the time of year for long walks in the woods, kicking up the leaves, collecting conkers and big roast dinners with the family, then falling asleep in front of the TV and thankfully the F1 circus rocks up to the interminably dull Sochi circuit.  

Russia has many fantastic cities; Moscow with its Red Square, St Petersburg  with the Hermitage and Sochi with its errrr .. with that thing the .. errrum. Oh yeah the industrial truck park round the back. No wait .. there’s that big round international flag thing, yeah that was interesting. A big long corner with no overtaking on it .. yeah. That corner was … well it looked nice, the one between that Aldi super store and Ikea outlet depot. Its supposed to be a the track winding its way through what is apparently the 2014 winter Olympic village, but it just looks like a brutalist theme park to me.

Yet another track shoehorned around an out of town shopping centre to promote a country by showing a really dull 2.4 miles of its car parks.  I mean Russia is a pretty big place, there is an awful lot of it and not an awful lot of people living on vast chunks of it. So why slap a street circuit around one of the least visually appealing ones?

[insert pictures of Dollars here]

Monaco  works because it has the weight of history behind it. Its slap bang in the middle of the city and it uses the landmarks to promote the city. It looks exciting, it looks dangerous and you can see the drivers having to work for their money.

Singapore works because it’s in the middle of the night, its brash bright neon lit, loud, fast, dangerous and exciting. You can’t really see the actual city but you can imagine it behind the floodlights and grandstands as an exciting place to visit. It has mystery and the lure of the orient about it.

Sochi meanwhile, looks like you can get a good two for one offer on cabbages soup, if the highly visible, highly armed and very mean looking troops don’t turn you away first. Oh it looks bright and sparkly new … but would you actually want to go there?

No this weekend has far more interesting things happening than a stodgy old race in Russia, trust me. But I’m afraid you’re going to need satellite TV to catch it, starting at midnight on Saturday we have the Australian V8 from Bathurst. One of the truly great race tracks in the world. An absolutely amazing ribbon of tarmac carved up the side of Mount Panorama in New South Wales. This is a real circuit for real proper drivers with grit and determination. Go and look for it on YouTube, type in Bathurst 1000 and marvel at what a car can do when its driven on the edge of reason round a mountain.

I have a bucket list of races I’m going to attend before the red wine catches up with my liver. Bathurst is front and centre top 3, behind a Le mans hospitality suite and grandstand seats over the start finish line at the Indy 500. As events go, the V8’s round Bathurst has to be seen to be believed. The fans drink enough booze to sink the titanic, they even had to limit the amount of beer being brought onto the circuit to 24 cans per person.

Next up and following right behind the Ozzy V8’s,  round 6 of the WEC from the Fuji international circuit in Japan. Yes I know it’s turning into a bit of a Porsche benefit year, but trust me, it’ll be worth getting up for, Fuji is a beautiful circuit.

Okay, watch those two if you can, then when the F1 start you won’t mind if it’s as dull as an English Rugby second half performance.

Other news … Bernie reckons the whole shebang will be sold off to the highest bidder before the end of the year ! Yes, odd news this, it might just be Bernie dangling a line during a slow news week to the more naïve elements of the press pack. But who knows with Bernie! Maybe CVC have had enough of teams asking for more money, they’re currently loading the cars with all the loot they can carry, Kevin has been sent back to check under the sofas in the staff canteen to look for any loose change they may have missed. The Big boss is sitting in the driver’s seat nervously checking his watch, the EU could be round any minute asking difficult questions  and he’s not the one who’s going down for this blag.

If CVC were to sell the right to F1 to some other shadowy group of faceless money men, Bernie would get a whole new shed full of dirty cash and no doubt be left in charge, despite being one hundred and eleventy stupid.  oooh sure Its’s all probably just more Bernie smoke and mirrors .. time as ever, will tell.

Good news for the Lotus peeps. Renault have said they’ll buy the gig and have signed something that keeps her Majesties customs and excise from the door until the end of the season. There is still no actual official announcement on what’s actually been bought and whose paying for what.  There are apparently several creditors with noses out of shape, you’d think they’d be used to that, having bank rolled Maldonado these past two years. One theory is, Renault will withdraw the team for 2016 so there are no Renault engines on the grid, which means they can redesign the whole thing and restart the team in 2017 with a brand new engine thus avoiding the whole tokens/points/money FIA mess thing.

Because they have told Redbull and by extension Torro Rosso what it can do with its engine contract. Tired of being blamed for the teams problems and passed over when  the glory is being handed out, Renault will not be supplying engines to either team in 2016. Now as I’m sure you’re all aware a car without an engine isn’t much of a race car. It’s not really a car at all is it? it’s a sled, and that’s about it. So Redbull have been flouncing around and waving their hands in the air and threatening to hold their breath and generally acting like spoilt children. See they treated Renault appallingly badly for years, and when they went knocking on the doors of other engine manufactures “demanding” no less, that they “give them an engine and it better be damn good mind you”  No company appears to be ready to deal with this petulant team.

They told Audi it had better give them an engine and stop with all the WEC nonsense right away, Audi mumbled something about being busy and winning and not needing the grief. Then VW who sort of own Audi got caught cheating on their road car emission tests and suddenly F1 with a team not known for hushing up engine problems, was not the place for a toxic brand.

So they went to Ferrari who said they had a couple of old units knocking around they could have at cost. Redbull said no Ferrari were to give them the best newest engines for free or they’d tell Bernie Ferrari was being mean. Ferrari laughed and told them to get lost.  

So Redbull knocked on Mercedes door demanding the same engines as the works team and this time they brought Bernie along. But Mercedes are winning and they don’t need the grief either. Bernie wasn’t happy about this and so in Japan, quite unrelated of course you understand, Mercedes who won the race at a canter were strangely absent from our television screens. Mercedes just shrugged and said “No, Redbull are not getting our engines in 2016”.

There’s always Honda I suppose ……. Hahahahahahahahaahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah

Ok, Sochi then, Merc and Ferrari, chased by Redbull and Williams .. Lotus now it’s got some money and Force India with something to prove. Verstappen will be the only thing worth watching if Mercedes don’t get any air time again.

Good luck

This is a plea for my liver .. has anyone got a spare ??

Okay, not the most exciting race I've ever got up at some ungodly hour for, especially one I spent the previous night watching England being beaten by Wales, for. I was particularly bleary of eye and in fact I missed the only interesting bit, the first 200 yards of the race, as I managed to sleep through the alarm.

Musshed get up ... the race will be amazing.. mush get....up ....zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

So yeah, I missed Hamilton motor past Nico when the lights went out. Much the same as I slept through the first 40 minutes of qualifying. Don't get me wrong I really love Suzuka it's one of the world's great tracks and the fans are up there with their Italian and British brethren. But it starts at six in the morning and there was a lot of Rugby on Saturday night and a bottle of Port might have been opened.

Well done Wales by the way, you beat the English fair and square, I can't really complain. But don't expect me to wake up early the next morning and have a ready supply of bon mots for you. I'm getting too old for all of this I'm afraid.

Errrre yeah good point, motor racing.

From what I remember .. I missed the start, Hamilton over took Nico and some people banged into each other. Okay .. And I joined the race as Nico went into the pits in third or possibly fourth.  Then I think some other people went into the pits and Nico was second and Vettel was third.

I might have drifted off for a bit, then Alonso was making everyone in the entire world aware that he thought the Honda engine was a pile of dung and just about good enough for a GP2 car, which seems about right, if a little tactless at Hondas home circuit, maybe.

Then the race was over and Hamilton had got the same number of wins as Senna (41, one less than Vettel stat fans) which seemed to make him quite happy.

Then I watched Big Ron turn up on Sky to play down Alonso getting all angry about the rubbish Honda engine and the media's ongoing attempts to crucify McLaren for getting things very wrong.

I got up to go and walk the dog at that point. Watching red faced loon's texting in to "Crofty" to stick the knife into McLaren was too much, a company makes a mistake and some of the more unhinged members of society seem to feel like it was some sort of personal insult to the fans or something. The only thing more baffling is the FIA website. I really urge you to go and see just how appalling it is, just try and find the current drivers championship standings  .. I defy you to do it in less than 20 minutes.

Ho and indeed hum. Yay, Lewis won, anyone think Hamilton isn't going to win the title now? Thought not! Sure there are five races to go, but barring some sort of season ending injury he's pretty much home and dry now, Nico hasn't got his game face on at all.  He didn't get pole though, Nico managed that before Kvyat smeared his car down the road in the dying minutes of qualifying.  Hamilton was going faster (I think as I say I was kind of bleary eyed for that too). But it meant nothing as Lewis just steamed past when the lights went out and then he drove round really quickly and won. Easy peasy.

Nico was second, again, because he's a number two driver.

Vettel was third because he has the next best thing to a factory Merc engine.

Kimi was forth because even he can get the next best thing to a Merc engine past the best customer Merc engine.

Bottas was fifth with the best customer Merc engine.

Hulkenberg managed to avoid hitting Massa this time and made a much better start than his team mate, he was sixth.

Grosjean was seventh and has announced he's off to new boys Hass F1 (Ferrari number 2 factory squad) next year. Because he knows that if Lotus are quite prepared to give Maldonado a new contract then winning isn't what they're racing for anymore.

Maldonado eighth blahdy blah blah. Imagine what a good driver could do with that lotus!

Ninth for Verstappen who could be amazing in a well funded  Merc engined car, I imagine when Redbull do finally throw their toys out of the pram and flounce off because no one want to give spoilt attention seeking children an engine next year. There is going to be more than an unseemly fight by the big boys for Verstappen's signature. There's going to be a blood bath. Maybe that's why Big Ron was all smiles despite Alonso, maybe he's already got the kid signed and Honda are ready to unveil an almighty engine any minute now.

Yeah Sainz was tenth and he isn't Verstappen, he's the guy Verstappen doesn't get out of the way for.

Oh Hamilton got the fastest lap and Stevens got beaten by Rossi again, so he was last. Imagine (once again) you are Will Stevens and you have been beating your rubbish team mate for 6 month, then an upstart Yank gets parachuted in with a massive pay-check and whip yer ass two races running. That's got to hurt, hasn't it?

Two weeks to Sotchi, a race I am really looking forward too ... (no, no I'm not)

Love and hugs.

Julian.

Its just a balloons worth of air really.

Hello

Quick one this week.

 Japanese GP looks like it is going to be a wet one again, so expect much tiptoeing around following a safety car for long periods.

Air pressures are going to be the big talking point of the weekend I am afraid. The FIA’s new random tyre pressure check now has some guidelines and defined parameters for the teams to get all prissy about. The knock on effect of this is Mercedes appear to have lost a good second off their lap times. It never ceases to amaze me just how infinitesimally small the margins are in F1, If you’ve ever played Gran Turimso or Forza or any of the myriad PC racing games, you’ll have messed around with the car settings. Now, if you’re honest with yourself you don’t really have much idea  what you’re doing do you, whack on some off camber, up the spring knock rate, turn down the anti-roll snaffle flange pin, lower the ride height and stick on some big fat wings.  Make any difference? Nope, though not.   

Yet in F1, upping the air pressure by 0.5psi and suddenly Mercedes are struggling to keep up with the Ferraris. Change the ride height by 2mm and Maldonado is skating off into the Armco … no wait that happens whatever. So yeah, Tyre pressures will be the talking point on track.

Off track and the woes for Lotus continue, due to a “late payment or two”. This meant there was a delay in the equipment arriving from Singapore and a lot of standing around looking annoyed for the Lotus set up personnel.  The cars will be there on Friday morning for first practice, just how ready they will be well, that is anyone’s guess.

In addition, anyone’s guess will be the whereabouts of Jenson next year, there were many rumours floating around the media world at the start of the week, that Button will announce his retirement from F1 this weekend. McLaren have had a torrid time of 2015, the engine is clearly more wrong than a Torro Rosso team order call and the car appears to have been designed by a gang of Albanian welders high on rubbing alcohol. Basically, it’s all an utter mess for the Woking team, so why would he want to stay, they messed him around last year about keeping his seat and they appear to be messing him around this year about keeping his seat.

If he’s going then most people expect him to announcing something this weekend. I hope he goes to WEC but I expect he’ll be setting up some iron man world series thing.

Ok

This track is a bit more old school with nice flowing bits and less stop start nonsense. I can’t see anyone touching the Merc for ole and the win, last weekend was just a set up blip, tyre pressures notwithstanding, they’re faster in the high speed stuff then Ferrari and Redbull. HOWEVER, if Ferrari were to be pole or the front row, then Hamilton’s 50 point championship lead might seem a bit too narrow for comfort on the Merc pit wall, and the Mercedes pit wall has been known to make mistakes when it feels under pressure. ~We might just have a race on our hands afterall.

Predictions need to be updated before midnight, good luck, 

Holiday over, on with the show.

Hello.

I’m back, sort of.

Let’s see, I'm a bit out of the loop now. I’ve still not seen the British or Hungarian races yet, which is probably a mistake as they sound like the two best races of the year so far. The results certainly suggest interesting stuff happen in Hungary; Lewis had a bit of a meltdown, Vettel continued to build his “SAVIOUR OF FERRARI” re brand and Redbull got their act together on a track where good handling always pays dividends.  I imagine I'll watch them one day but probably not this year.

So, after a four week break the circus returns to Europe for the Belgium Grand Prix.

Not a lot happened during those four weeks to trouble the serious F1 view, even Bernie managed to keep his PR machine under wraps and avoid bad mouthing the sport during the summer holiday.

The teams agreed to limit pit wall involvement in the start of the race, so no ideal clutch settings and no telling the driver where the puddles are.  Mercedes are expected to be the big losers here, and at the British GP Williams showed they weren't worried in the slightest.

Honda said they'd found a who bunch of speed and were almost as good as Ferrari now, McLaren then said they'd not been planning on using a B spec engine any time. Which suggests the engine now has the horse power is was missing at the start of the year, let's hope they find the reliability to go with it

The expectation was we would hear about Kimi's replacement by the Italian GP if not sooner. The Media have been writing him off since Vettel started winning and the grumpy Fin didn't. Failing to win in Hungary was seen as the last nail in Kimi's career coffin, so any day now he was going to be farmed off to some third rate team to try and offset the money Ferrari would pay Williams for Bottas.

Except, they didn't. ...I know, what a surprise ... or not. It was announced today (Wednesday) that Kimi has been retained for next year at least and I suspect until Bottas or Hulkenberg are out of contract.

Okay then, things to watch this weekend.

Lewis: More madness or level headed points gathering.

Rosberg: What excuse will he use to explain being beaten this time?

Ferrari: Flash in the pan or second coming?

Kimi: Will he be less grumpy now he has a 2016 contract?

 McLaren: will they get both cars home and in the points, will the new engine hand together.

Renault: trimmed out for the straight bits, hanging it out on the twisty boys. New shiny engine bits.

Williams: will be looking for a podium at the least here, expect Bottas to be gungho for pole.

Update your predictions before Friday :)

Ramble on ...

Ok then, time for a bit of perspective.

Is Formula one in trouble …. ?

Yes, yes of course it is. Half the teams are spending more time fighting creditors off with a finely tooled carbon prop shaft than chasing championship points. The racing is restricted by tyres that go off way too fast, fuel flow meters mean drivers have to lift and coast rather and nail it where the angels fear to tread. The muddy scum on the banking are kept well away from any contact with those paid to entertain them. Social media is a dirty word as other racing series fall over themselves to throw information at the punters, overload them with data and behind the scenes footage. F1 inc is taking down fans Youtube clips taken from six miles away on the banking, banning online F1 games that haven’t paid for the rights to use the drivers names or results of the races. There’s no attempt to engage with the audience, it’s only available to those prepared to pay through the nose for access and information. And that access and information is tightly controlled by just one man, a man dismissive of anyone that doesn’t have the money to buy a seat at his expensive race day tables. And a man who isn’t too concerned just where that money will have come from either. Dodgy third world dictator, not a problem, questionable attitude to human rights, come on in.

The only people telling you there isn’t a problem are those with a vested interest in things staying exactly as they are; Anyone connected with Mercedes, Bernie and his various tame media outlets, the FIA, Pirelli tyres, Ferrari. But not Redbull, especially not Redbull who are lying on the ground kicking their heels, throwing their toys at any passing media and screaming red faced at absolutely anyone that will listen about how unfair it is that they aren’t winning anymore.  It’s all particularly unseemly.

So yes, on and off track, it’s not looking too clever really. Talking of clever, where are the F-ducts and mass dampers? Those clever bits of thinking that can turn a midfield garagista into a front runner …. Banned.  The only difference now is buried deep under the carbon fibre skin, electrical systems tick and fizzle with innovation. KERS and ERHS powering man and machine faster for less fuel, more bang for your bucks. But all kept oh so secret, until it explodes then the fingers start pointing and shoulders are shrugged.

All this would be fine of course if there was a BUT next wouldn’t it ….. Nope I can’t think of one. The absolute highlight of the season so far, the biggest talking point, was Mercedes calling Hamilton in when he was leading the Monaco GP, oh and Maldonado crashing a lot.

Did you catch any of the other motor sport events I mentioned at the start of June ?

It all kicked off with the Canadian GP; Hamilton was the fastest, some cars almost hit some local wildlife. I fell asleep.

The following weekend was Le Mans and possibly one of the best races of the past decade, Porsche and Audi scrapping it out for the win, Toyota completely outgunned, Nissan getting a rude awakening and a social media kicking, the plucky KCMG squad from Hong Kong taking the LMP2 win with a faultless run ahead of much more experience teams. Then Corvette taking the honour in GT pro after a race long battle with Ferrari and a fleet of Aston Martins. Heartbreak for Aston in GT am with a crash for the leading car with less than an hour to go, Dempsey making in onto the podium in second behind the SMP Ferraris.  It had everything this year, racing all race long, beer,  Audi beaten at last, baguettes, Corvette winning, roast chicken. I hardly slept for 24 hours.

The Austrian GP: Roseberg was the fastest, I was in London having a good time with my son. So I didn’t fall asleep during the race this time, I fell asleep watching the highlights instead.

And finally I couldn’t find any live streams of Pikes peak. But I did watch the Formula E race from London, the final round of this new championship and it was an absolute belter. Buemi looked like he’d cruse to the title, but Piquet Jr drove a spectacular second race to hold onto the championship lead by two points.

Formula E is an odd thing, because the cars will only do half the race they have to swap cars at about half distance. So the driver has a choice weather to lift and coast to save power so they can get an extra lap to have more power with the second car at the end. Or go hell for leather at the start, build a big lead and then eak out the power of the second car to defend the lead. Where F1 is dull because the drivers are having to lift and coast from pretty much lap 4, Formula E manages to make this racing exciting. 

Putting up temporary circuits in cities around the world has brought the racing to people who wouldn’t normally see any live racing, okay the design of the circuits needs a little more thought. They were often too narrow for the bumpy city roads and parks and didn’t always promote much overtaking. But the cars looked fast on the narrow tracks, overtaking had to be about picking the right moment and often muscling past defensive minded drivers.  They might not have sounded very interesting, but the cars look different and the racing was exciting.

With both Le Mans and the Formula E races, social media was all over them like a rash!

I watched Le Mans from the comfort of my sofa, I had my nice big tv with its HD picture showing the two days of practice, and the entire 24 hour race. I had my PC set up showing a full timing service, Tweetdeck following all the major players who tweeted constantly, Facebook with various motorsport sites running race long threads. I watched live feeds from the 3 Nissan in car cameras with Nismo TV’s youtube feed. They had live reports from the pits, the cars, a studio at the back of the garage. Nissan had a great social media race if not an actual race.

Formula E actively encourages fans to get involved with their “Fan boost” via the FIA website.  Fans vote for their favourite driver and the top three get a five second power boast. It’s a bit simple, relies on the driver or teams PR department ability to reach out and do the FIA’s promotion for them. But as a direct result of this I’m now following Instagram feeds for Buemi and Bruno Senna and added dragon racing to my facebook time line. I’ve not watched the whole season, but I’ve watched races that I stumbled on whilst flicking though the tv channels.

So, formula one didn’t really shine in July, when the highlight of the month is Jean Todt telling Bernie to stop bad mouthing F1 to the Media and who is going to buy the rights to the series … you have a problem. There is no positive news from any of the teams or drivers or even the people charged with promoting the whole damn mass !

I have no idea what answer to all this is, but what F1 needs right now is someone to lead the thing whose primary concern isn’t his own ego, legacy or bank balance.

Okay, enough grumpy complaining .. We have the British GP this weekend to look forward to.

Well we do, and if you like watching Kimi being evasive in front of a frenzied media witch hunt you’re in for a proper treat.

The last few weeks have seen Kimi struggle to qualify well and then keep up with either of the Merc or his team mate Vettel. Normally this wouldn’t be too much of a problem, a number two driver is supposed to be there or there about’s and not put the highly paid number one under too much pressure. But this is Ferrari and any sign of weakness is jumped upon by the Italian media and eventually the rest join in. It’s a quite month, not a lot of on track action to write about, let’s pick on a driver make him feel bad about his perceived lack of performance.

So the media have been rumbling for a week or two now about how badly Kimi was doing, the usual “Ferrari number two poison chalice” stuff. If Ferrari isn’t coming first and second than clearly it’s the number two drivers fault. Then Arrivabene held a press conference to say no they weren’t looking to sign Bottas any time soon despite not being asked that question, and the interest in Kimi ramped up.

Vettel is doing a good job of looking renewed and exciting, he got a win and Kimi has failed to win anything and is thus now over the hill and ready for a job at Marussia apparently.

And this week, apparently Ricciardo thinks it’s “nice” that Ferrari are interested in signing him at some unspecified time despite a rock solid contract with Redbull. So the media circus is chasing Kimi around asking him when he’s going to be fired and why is he so rubbish now. Kimi, not the most charismatic media presence, is hiding behind his big glasses and muttering “no comment” whenever he’s asked about his future. Expect this weekend TV coverage to be dominated by this total non-story.

Right, yes, Silverstone .. total power circuit, so Merc win, and Ferrari close behind, the same as Austria and Canada really. I should imagine that Hamilton would like to get a win on home soil, it’s a circuit he likes and knows well. Nico will probably be right in his wheel tracks.

Errr Ferrari (Vettel) the Williams boys looking to put on a good show, Lotus with renewed vigour and I thinks its Perez’s turn to do well this weekend. Throw in a Torro Rosso for the laughs.

Things to look out for, how many engine changes Renault have across all their teams. How many laps the McLarens complete all weekend long and how many grid penalties they get starting from Friday practice one. Will Kimi make it to Q2. And how many minutes Redbull last before they start complaining about their Renault engine.

Once again, I have father/son duties to perform with a party for him and his mates. So the results might be a touch late.

Good luck.   

Back to the grind I'm affraid.

Right. Okay, I'm afraid these are going to have to get a bit more focused and shorter now. It's one month till my wife is due to give birth, so I have a huge long list of stuff which I'm supposed to be sorting out. Rather than wasting my time away writing silly Formula one stuff.  

But I've sneaked a beer into the den and closed the door. I think I've got enough time to give you a preview of the weekends Austrian GP.

So then Mercedes will win .... Or will they ? Austria is very much like Canada, long fast bits with a couple of tight chicanes. It flows up and down the side of a mountain and fast times come from fast powerful engines; Mechanical grip is required as the teams trim the cars out to make them as slippery as possible.

Ferrari was right up Mercedes chuff in Canada, or they would have been if Vettels power unit had held together. Kimi normally qualifies a few tenths off Vettel and in Canada he was only half a second or so behind Nico's rear wing. If Vettel hadn't had his problems he would have been right up there making Mercedes work for their points. So Ferrari should be just as fast this time and a punt on some Vettel top step action isn't such a long shot. You certainly want at least one Ferrari on the podium.

But what about a Williams up there, I hear you cry. Well last year they should have sneaked a victory, but pragmatic point scoring trumped spirited racing. This year the car is just as fast and now more reliable, but the Mercs have pulled further ahead and Ferrari have got their engine working so the best they can reasonably hope for is a fourth but it'll probably be a fifth. Really they're waiting for last year's prize money to clear Bernie's "resting account" around the last third of the season. Next year it's going to be all about the Williams boys, trust me ;)

Lotus looked to have got their act together in Canada; Grosjean was beaten fair and square by Maldonado who managed to avoid hitting anything for a change. Austria being a power circuit I think a top ten is more than likely, and there's plenty of space for Pastor to charge around in.

Out of the points will be all the Renault drivers again. The Redbull A1 ring that Redbull pay to maintain, goes up the side of a mountain so if your engine runs out of puff on anything longer than 100 yards of straight road, you're in trouble. I've lost count of how many engines the various Redbull and Torro Rosso drivers are on but I expect someone will get a penalty for changing something this weekend. A Renault engine car in the top ten is a very long shot this weekend.

And finally Nico Hulkenberg, He's had a bit of a quite season thus far. So he went off and with the help of Porsche, British driver Nick Tandy and New Zealander Earl Bamber, only went and won Le Mans. It was mostly due to Nick Tandy who drove it like he stole it though the night. But this wasn't some seat of the pants, wing and a prayer, last man standing win. This was a gutsy, hard fought and well deserved win, beating the normally ruthless Audi winning machine. We all knew the Hulk was a top class driver and I hope he gets a bit more respect now, If he isn't in a factory LMP1 program next year, there's no justice in this world.

Right that's enough. Flip a coin to chose who follows Lewis home, Mercs and Ferraris up front, Williams best of the rest, throw in a Lotus and a Force India and then chose between the remaining Merc engine cars for the rest of the top ten.    

Oh one last thing ... McLaren Honda. The tension ramped up several notches in Canada. Alonso openly saying "Look the car is dog slow, unreliable and handles like a fat kid in a chocolate shop..... Now you're telling me its thirsty too.  Oh for f.... "

Alonso is not a happy camper. This is not the McLaren he signed up for and he can see no end to the pain he's having to endure at each round this year. There seems to be an awful lot of head scratching around the car and yet another bit melts, or falls off, or grenades itself, of just stops working.  Sure the other teams had these teething problems last year! But Honda had a year off testing whatever they wanted to for however long they wanted, they had no testing restrictions at all to sort these problems out.

The car is fundamentally wrong, the engine is going to take years to sort, meanwhile the Merc and Renault squads are getting further up the road. 

The Hulk goes off and wins Le Mans in the car Alonso was expected to be in, but was banned from racing by Big Ron. I wouldn't be surprised if Fernando burst into Ron's office and demonstrated his frustration to Ron using the medium of a clenched fist. Repeatedly.

Right no, that is it. Update your prediction before Friday please and good luck.

It's going to be a busy month !

June is the here and that means Motorsport heaven.

If the smell of burning four star, smells like victory to you and the sound of big grunty engines powering through the cool night air raises the hairs on the back of the neck. June is just ram packed with high octane fun for you.

We start this weekend with the Canadian GP, a proper old school track surrounded by fans who know where the engine is in an F1 car. I love this track, the first half is tight and flowing through the tree lined park. The run back to the start line is a flat out blat along the waterfront before the deceptively easy looking chicane and the wall of champions.   

Once we’re through with F1 in Canada, the focus pulls back to Europe and the Le Mans 24 hours world endurance race.  Which is my personal heaven; it’s a party with a race in the middle, a weeklong orgy of fast cars, beers, chips, and baguettes. Headlights and glowing brake discs, V8s, V10s, turbos and whisper quite diesels, runny cheese and smelly toilets. Think Glastonbury with slightly less mud and much better catering.

Eurosport are coving the whole thing on TV, There is a WEC app with live timing, highlights and commentary for your phones and tablets. Last year you could watch the whole race from inside the Audi or Porsche cars, with live telemetry beamed to your PC. This year Nissan have a whole suit of online content to impress you with and Corvette will have pits and car cams, pit wall audio. If Bernie think the new digital media world is a waste of time, he should see what the Endurance racing world is doing, there is so much content, you can’t fail to be impressed. Its inviting, it welcomes you to the party rather than demand the contents of your wallet and give you a warm sausage on an F1 branded cocktail stick.

We stay in Europe for weekend three and the Austria F1 GP at the reopened Redbull A1 ring. Last year was a nip and tuck fight between the Merc, but Williams missed their best chance of a spoiler. This year with Ferrari bringing a fast car to the party we could see their second win of the year.

And finally, the last weekend of June we have the Pikes peak hillclimb event in Colorado USA, the second oldest motorsport event in America, they’ve been racing up this hillside since 1916 testing man and machinery to the limit over 12.42 miles (19.99 km) through 156 turns, climbing 4,720 ft (1,440 m). And these aren’t boys in ratty Lotus sevens and clapped out minis, in 2013 Peugeot sent Sebastien Loeb up the hill in a 875 bhp 3.2ltr V6 monster in a time of 8:13.878 shattering the previous record by 44 seconds.

From one of the oldest motorsport events to a possible future for motor sport and the London round of the Formula E series. Now before you throw your arms in the arm and flounce off muttering about how electric cars sound awful and it’s just rubbish, rubbish I say. Have you actually watched any of the racing ? Because what I’ve seen has been pretty good so far, there is certainly more racing than F1 can muster these days. Yes, it’s a bit cack handed with swapping from one car to another half way through because the battery technology is a bit duff. The fan boost

is more about good social media skills than racing ability and yes some team are there to make the numbers up. But at its core its racing, it is exciting and it will only get better.

So that’s June for you. And it all kicks off this weekend in Canada.

The talking point is going to be Lewis and his relationship with the team here, which is a bit of a shame because as I said I really like this track and the racing is usually pretty good. It’s refreshingly old school, it doesn’t look like some bland industrial estate on the outskirts of a large urban splat in this month fashionable third world dictatorship. The fans in the seats are there by choice having bought tickets with their money and will fill all the stands. Thus providing what is increasingly becoming unique at F1 events these days, an atmosphere. We should be celebrating this, not asking weather Lewis is talking to Toto or who’s making the strategy calls on the pit wall.

Anyway, Merc blah blah blah, Lewis Pole and the win if there's any justice.  But Nico has had two wins on the bounce now, so you never know. They had a problem with their brakes in Canada last year and this year Lewis had problems with his brakes in Barcelona i think it was. So they may opt to play it say and not disappear off into the distance, if they play that game then Ferrari might try to push them the see how well their brakes hold up. The temperatures look like they're going to be high this weekend too, so we could see another tyre wear race.

Barcelona showed just how far the Mercs were ahead of the Ferraris, and I would expect to see the same sort of advantage here with Williams as usual next, Force India and maybe Lotus. Actually, I think Kimi could be on for a good one here. Yeah, i think he'll be on the podium here, for no other reason than I think it's his turn. The team can't keep screwing him over can they ?

The brave amongst you will put a Renault car in the top ten, Torro Rosso maybe might just sneak Verstappen or Sainz in if the other teams have problems. But Redbull are going to struggle on a power circuit with an underpowered engine and a car with handling issue. The Redbull PR machine has gone quite of late regarding how jolly unfair it all is for them, their threat to flounce off if Audi refused join them backfired when Audi said it had no plans to join F1. And then no one backed Helmet Markos' plans to let Redbull win because they were Redbull and really, really, really important. The drivers have been told to grumble about unfair engine rules to little effect. There was a sort of grudging acknowledgment that "yeah, Newey had built a bit of a dog this time" and then a shrug as they accepted they were going to get grid penalties for using too many engines.

I don't know if they're first +1 engine will get used this weekend but it wouldn't surprise me. So putting Ricciardo in the top ten is going to be very risky.

 Okay, enough random rubbish. Predictions in before Friday as per usual cheers.

And finally, I'm sort of thinking about a doing a one off prediction game for Le Mans this year. Top 15, pole, fastest lap and the total number of laps the winner completes. Drop me an email if you're interested, this would be a spread sheet one off so I'd need a fair few players to make it worthwhile.

Cheers all, and good luck.