Alonso is faster than you, DON’T LET HIM PAST!!!

Well that was all very interesting wasn’t it?

Maybe not a classic race, after all watching driver’s work out how long their tyres are going to last isn’t what I call fantastic racing, but it does set up the final race as a bit of a nail biter. 

Now the idea that Nico had happily rolled over to let his mate win the world championships can be put to bed at least. Nico was imperious all weekend long; Lewis was always following in his wheel tracks from the moment they went out to first practice. Qualifying was just a case of how close Lewis was going to get to his team mate because the result was never in doubt.

It also confirmed that Rosberg has been the fastest qualifier all year. For which there is a trophy ... which I did know about but forgot to mention all year long. Sorry. You’d think I’d make a big thing out of it too, seeing as we try to predict who’s going to be on pole each race. So yeah, if you’d put Rosberg down for the pole each race, chances are you were going to be right.  And once again Brazil, on Saturday, was all about Rosberg at his best.

Unlike the Circuit of the America’s or Monaco however, Lewis doesn’t go well here. Yes, yes he was second and never really looked like being anything else. But he didn’t look like he had any sort of answer to Rosberg, he was always behind him. And them in the race when he had that one chance to pump the fast laps in and use the pit stop cycle to take the lead, he fluffed it. Ratty tyres and over confidence spun him off the track and into second place.

He blinked, this time he made the unforced error and suddenly he’s on the back foot going into the final race of the year.

The other highlight was Alonso getting the proverbial two fingers from Ferrari. For the past 5 years the ringing phrase “Alonso is faster than you, do you understand” would be floated over the airwaves and Massa or Kimi would “fluff” a gear change out of a lesser corner and allow the Spaniard past to pick up a few extra points. This time however, there were no instructions to Kimi to fade off the throttle on a long straight. This time the message was loud and clear. “Alonso is faster than you, DON’T LET HIM PAST!!!”. An ignominious end to a unsuccessful partnership. But you know scrapping it out for sixth place isn’t all that glamorous really.

Okay, the race was tense but like a Christmas stocking from Aldi’s thin on excitement and ultimately unsatisfying.

Rosberg got pole and won. Part one or operation “show everyone i can win a world championship” complete. He looked like he was cruising all weekend long. Nobody else was as fast as he was when it mattered. Job done.

Hamilton was second and got the fastest lap. Technically he didn’t need to win, but it would have made things in Abu Dhabi easier for him. Now he has to be second or better to Nico to take the title.

Massa was third and almost threw it all away. He was pinged for speeding in the pit lane at his first stop, with a five second stop and hold at his second stop. It looked like he’s blown it until Bottas had a problem with his seatbelts at his next pit stop and handed back the podium to Massa. There was some speculation that the Williams boys could get a win here, but it turn out that Mercedes already had their towels on the top steps. Still they did enough to pretty much bury Ferraris chances of third in the constructors race.

Button was fourth and once again showed why he should keep his seat for next year. Maybe McLaren will surprise us all and tell Alonso where he can stick his whiny arse next year. Jenson has, I think he’ll admit, had a difficult year but when the car has been on song he’s shown some real metal out there. There are divers from South American countries with far more money than talent, who can’t hold a candle to Button. Even Massa with his double vision and inability to remember telephone numbers these days has a quality drive. So the fact Button is facing the door marked EXIT is a real shame. Yeah sure I haven’t been his biggest cheer leading section over the years but I always said he had the talent and right to be there.

Vettel in fifth, well he had a lot of good cars over the years. I’ll leave it at that. . .... okay, okay, he made a few good overtaking moves and looked a bit feisty at times. But he’s off to retirement with Ferrari next year, make no mistake of that.

Alonso did nothing but complain and throw toys and blankets and wet wipes and rattles from the pram all weekend long on the way to sixth. There’s going to be no leaving party for these two at the end of the year. He was stuck behind Kimi at the end of the race for just long enough to stop him having a chance of catching Vettel.  Ferrari were willing to throw away the chance of beating Williams to third in the constructors rather than let tell Kimi to let Alonso past. Imagine how much money those constructors’ points are worth.  Just to stick one to a driver who they have failed to give a worthy car to.  It would be amusing if it wasn’t so pathetic.

Kimi was seventh and made hard work of that.

Hulkenberg who we have missed over the last few races, got a contract for next year with Force India (sort of) and remembered what the loud pedal was for again. Eighth was creditable result.

Magnussen was ninth and like button still doesn’t know if he’ll be driving for McLaren next year.

Finally Bottas was tenth, there was a problem with his belts, sure, but Massa had a five second penalty and still got on the podium.

Okay, Hamilton fastest lap ..

.. and Sutil is this weeks last places driver. He’s been given the heave ho to, no real surprise to me, his return was always a bit odd I though. This year’s Sauber has been a bucket of bolts held together with duck tape and faith mostly Sutils done what he can, but not enough it would seem. He’s better than Gutierrez, in the same way as David Cameron is better than Nick Clegg.